Well, H7 fell off her horse today. She was coming around a turn at a fairly quick trot, the horse was spooked by a shaft of sunlight coming through a crack in the barn and took off. H7 kind of slipped off the side and landed on her butt. She got up quickly, but not before my world came to a complete stop, I let out a terribly shrill scream, and I realized I was gripping my youngest daughter so hard she couldn’t breathe. Absolutely terrifying.
Her instructor was great. High 5’s were exchanged. She kept it light as soon as she realized H7 was fine. H7 got back up, rode for another couple of minutes, and her instructor gave her a little pep talk. H7 held it together, even putting on her most convincing smile for her teacher and me, insisting she was fine, and we walked out the door.
I made her sit up front with me in the van on the way home. I basically insisted she cry about it, because I knew she was holding back a torrent of emotion (as was I.) We both bawled all the way home. Maybe that was wrong of me not to let her keep up the strong front – but I wanted her to let go of that terrible ball of anxiety and stress. I wanted her to express it – the fear and shame she felt, the pain, how hard it was to keep going and not break down – whatever. Many hugs and kisses were exchanged and I think she’s in a good place.
She’s not afraid to go back next week, but, oh Lord – I am! Pray for me friends. 🙂